Greetings underlings, I am your new mistress Brunthilda Evalindravon the Fifth, but you may call me Miss Whiskers. I am 900 years old and the greatest witch alive. I have the most extensive knowledge of all things arcane, which makes halloween my own personal holiday. I am worshiped all over the world for my knowledge and beauty (or at least I was until I was turned into a cat). But, even as a cat I am worshiped in many ways, and soon I shall return to my former glory.
I have come to you because I heard you required help with your halloween preparations. While I do have a very busy schedule, I am an expert on all things spooky and my party planning skills are second to none. To make sure that things are done right I will simply have to take over for your administrators. They don't know I'm here just yet, which is a little distressing since I did announce my presence earlier. Perhaps they are too wrapped up in their own trivial business to have noticed the claw marks all over the furniture. I shall have to punish them later with some menial task. Let's face it, you mortals just don't know what to do with yourselves without someone as genius as myself to tell you what to do. So, you minions all belong to me now.
Now don't think I will be distracted with a ridiculous ball of string and eat catnip all day, both of which I will need in great quantities post haste. I am basically your supreme ruler for the duration and you shall worship me as such. You will lavish me with shiny things and gourmet fish everyday, and you will provide me with a dedicated groomer. You will tell me I am a pretty kitty at least once every hour, and that means all of you. In return I shall arrange some games and contests for you to amuse yourselves when you're not tending to my glorious self.
Oh, and if anyone happens to see a bright red dot moving about the floor please let me know. I hate to admit that there is some magic that I do not yet comprehend, but this red dot cannot escape me forever. I am very close to learning its secrets.
Now go, gather your gifts to me and when you return I shall have a list of festivities for you.